


Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

by novocaine_sea



Series: Akaashi Rare Pair Week 2017! [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Established Relationship, Insecurity, M/M, Stand Alone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-21
Updated: 2017-06-21
Packaged: 2018-11-14 07:36:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11203380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/novocaine_sea/pseuds/novocaine_sea
Summary: Day 4: InsecuritiesWhen Akaashi looks in the mirror he hates everything he sees. Luckily, Iwaizumi loves everything he sees when he looks at Akaashi.





	Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

The mirror taunted him. It reminded him of what he hated. What did he hate, you may ask?

Everything. He hated everything that the mirror showed him.

His eyes were too sunken in, his lips were too thin, his skin was too oily, his hair was too unkempt. He was too skinny, gangly arms hanging by his side and the t-shirt he wore fell right off a bony shoulder. He was skin and bones. He was a skeleton.

Akaashi Keiji splashed some cold water on his face, hoping it would rid him of some of these qualities. Maybe if he put water on his face the oil would melt right off and his hair would fall flat and stay that way. He never really had any luck before.

He parted his cracked lips and exhaled. Behind thin lips were crooked teeth, not that crooked but if somebody were to look up close they could see that they weren’t in the right places. Akaashi could feel them with his tongue every time he became aware of the bones in his mouth. He wondered if his boyfriend could feel the crookedness when his tongue was in Akaashi’s mouth. That happened often enough, even if Akaashi still didn’t understand how.

Iwaizumi Hajime was everything compared to Akaashi. He was buff, barely fitting into even his loosest shirt. He had beautiful, bright green eyes. He was able to tan unlike Akaashi who burnt into a crisp under the sun. He was able to style his hair in a way that it stayed standing and there was never a fly-away hair out of place. Iwaizumi was perfect and had a shining personality to match his looks. 

Akaashi was as bland as a piece of untoasted bread. He would go as far as to say he was soggy bread. Absolutely disgusting.

Akaashi quickly brushed his teeth, spitting the foamy substance into the sink and rinsing his mouth out before walking into the kitchen. Iwaizumi was cooking breakfast: eggs and pancakes. Since it was the weekend, neither of them had to work so they could just lounge around.

Iwaizumi looked up and beamed at him. “Good morning.” 

Akaashi didn’t trust his voice so he only nodded and opened the refrigerator, pulling out the carton of orange juice. When he stole a glance at Iwaizumi the older of the two was still smiling, looking at the eggs in the pan. Akaashi wished he had something to smile about.

In reality, Akaashi had everything to smile about. He had a great life; he got his degree in biochemistry and he was living in a nice apartment with his boyfriend of two years and a dog they adopted together. It was far from terrible. But that morning, Akaashi couldn’t find anything to love about anything, much less himself. He poured himself a glass of orange juice and took a large sip.

“You’re quiet.” Iwaizumi stated as he filled two plates of food. He placed one gingerly in Akaashi’s free hand and motioned him over to the kohatsu. Akaashi sat across from him, tucking his legs underneath him instead of under the cloth.

“Yeah.” Akaashi shrugged and picked at his food. He wasn’t that hungry.

Iwaizumi hummed and they ate in silence. The only sound were their utensils hitting the plate, most Iwaizumi’s, chiming and echoing off the walls. One was more harsh than the other; it was a symbol of their personalities.

“Do you think I’m boring?” Akaashi questioned suddenly. He really hadn’t meant for it to be said aloud but once it was out of his mouth he couldn’t take it back.

Iwaizumi looked at him bewildered, eggs dropping to his lap in his shock. “What?”

Akaashi looked to the side. “Forget it.”

“No, wait, why would I think you’re boring?”

Akaashi lifted his shoulders in another shrug.

A sigh sounded from the opposite side of the table. “Keiji…”

“Please just forget I asked.” Akaashi’s voice was so small. He wished he was as small as he sounded. He wanted to curl up into a ball and shrink down until he was microscopic. He could float through the universe unnoticed that way.

“No.” Iwaizumi crossed his arms over his chest and Akaashi stole a glance at him. He looked more concerned than anything. “I don’t think you’re boring at all. Do I look like the type of person who would date somebody boring?”

Akaashi pursed his lips together and fiddled with his fingers in his lap, otherwise saying nothing. He didn’t have an answer.

Another sigh sounded. “Keiji, do  _ you  _ think you’re boring?”

“I-” The answer would be yes, he did think he was boring. He was incredibly bland. Why did Iwaizumi even like him? “Yes.” The word was foreign in his mouth; never before had he admitted it out loud.

Akaashi’s eyes followed Iwaizumi as he rounded the table to sit beside him, pulling Akaashi into his arms. His embrace was tight, light fingers trailing up and down Akaashi’s spine soothingly. It made Akaashi bite his cheek to stop the impending tears filling his eyes.

“I think you’re one of the most interesting people I’ve ever met.” Iwaizumi whispered in his ear, never letting go of him. “You’re incredibly kind to the people you love and you can be sassy in the most interesting ways. I’ve never seen somebody who could combat Oikawa with sass.” Akaashi snorted lowly and a smile returned to Iwaizumi’s voice. “You volunteer at animal hospitals on the weekends even though you’re exhausted from the week’s work. You-”

“You volunteer too…” Akaashi mumbled into Iwaizumi’s shoulder.

Iwaizumi poked his side, causing Akaashi to squeak in surprise. He was extremely ticklish, something Iwaizumi knew very well. Iwaizumi laughed heartily and kissed Akaashi’s cheek. “You were the one who introduced me to the place though. I wouldn’t have volunteered if it hadn’t been for you.”

“I just…” Akaashi hid his face from Iwaizumi. “I feel like you could do so much better than me. I’m not… You left Oikawa for me and I don’t....”

“Oikawa and I were doomed from the start, I think.” Iwaizumi ran his fingers through Akaashi’s hair and lifted his head so they could look each other in the eye. “I loved him but I think I loved him more than he loved me. But he’s happy with Kuroo now right? And I’m happy with you. We fit better as friends.”

“What if you start feeling the same way about me?” Akaashi felt the anxiety set in. What if he loved Iwaizumi more than Iwaizumi loved him? What if Iwaizumi never got over Oikawa, despite saying over and over again that he was over it. “I’m not as… bright as Oikawa is. I’m not as pretty as him or as muscular. I’m just this frail person who barely has his life together.” He could barely breathe.

“What are you talking about? I would say that you’re ten times sexier than Oikawa, especially in my clothes. Not to hate on the asshole of course, but...” Iwaizumi tugged at the shirt that Akaashi was wearing which was, in fact, Iwaizumi’s. Akaashi hugged himself, feeling more self conscious than he had while staring at his reflection. 

“I don’t know what else you want me to say to you, Keiji.” Iwaizumi said. “I love you. I love you more than I’ve loved anybody else. If you’re worried I’m going to leave you or something-”

Akaashi cut him off. “No, I just… I’m just worried. About everything. Nothing in particular.” 

“Is there anything I can do to help you?” Iwaizumi gripped his upper arm.

Akaashi licked his lips. Suddenly they didn’t feel so chapped and thin anymore. Iwaizumi was squeezing a bone but a muscle. Akaashi’s skin felt clear and his eyes were opened more. He didn’t feel as disgusting as he had twenty minutes prior.

Akaashi didn’t give him a response, just leaned in and kissed him softly. That was the only response Iwaizumi needed as he laid Akaashi back against the cushions, kissing him senseless. 


End file.
